five years...

it feels like a lifetime ago, though. i don't know who i'd be if it weren't for My Chemical Romance. this band has helped me so much through the years. i'm literally blasting off all their albums as i write this. it feels really good.

(i've told this story too many times before) i remember the first time i've listened to them, a friend introduced them to me, she showed me the music video for "Helena" and i remember thinking "i'm scared, who the fuck are these guys?". like, i instantly loved the music, but their looks were just... wow. i was thirteen years old and the only other contact with "heavy" music that i'd had was Linkin Park. and let's be honest, compared to the five guys rocking a church, dancing and singing in front of an open coffin with a dead lady inside, Linkin Park seemed pretty average. looks-wise, at least. of course, my 13-year-old self didn't have depression, so she didn't understand the meaning behind Linkin Park's lyrics, but that's for another post to talk about.

back to MCR... anyways, "Helena". i thought they were so weird, but then she showed me the music video for "I'm Not OK (I Promise)" (school version), and i was in love. oh my god, so awesome. i loved everything about it, the song, the lighting, the idea (little did i know Marc Webb was about to become one of my favorite music video directors of all time), everything about that music video was perfect.

then i started digging more into their music, and as i got progressively more into MCR, my friend started disliking them. i think it was because it was like 'her thing' or whatever, and she thought that since i loved them, it wasn't that special anymore? or at least that's how she acted, i think she pretended not to be in love with them in front of me but secretly still loved them to death. they were a pretty important band for her. i mean, we were thirteen, we were kids. you do stupid things when you're a kid. things that make you go "why did i do that? so stupid!".

i remember being (i shit you not) scared of their first album and the last tracks of "Three Cheers...", because they talked about death and murder and i didn't really get the meaning behind the metaphors; once i did was when i fell in love with song writing and story telling, and fucking Gerard way because he's so amazing at both. he's still my favorite lyricist. him and Ryan Ross (ex-Panic! At The Disco). i take my hat off. geniuses.

when i first bought the "Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge" CD, i was afraid to tell my mom because i thought she'd think i'm crazy or something because of the album cover. i literally hid it from her. hahaha. i was such a weird kid... i laugh now because when i put MCR on, my mom kinda knows the songs and sings along. my dad loves "The Black Parade" cuz it has a Queen vibe. i've broken my family. also: Rob Cavallo, man. MCR also introduced me to one of my favorite music producers. that fucking genius! when i heard Paramore was working with him for their third album (that turned out to be "Brand New Eyes"), i remember thinking "this is gonna be incredible". and it fucking was. ah, what a talented man. Howard Benson, too. fucking geniuses, goddamnit.

there isn't a song that MCR put out that i don't like. i love everything they've ever done. but if i had to pick a favourite album, it has to be "Conventional Weapons". even if it's not an album. just the idea of it being something secret that it was never supposed to see the light of day and then Frankie just insisting on publishing it. such raw, fed up songs. i mean, you can hear it in the music, you can listen to it in the lyrics, they were so fucking tired. every song is a statement of "if this what you want? here you go, shove it up your ass, see if i give a shit!". i love it. but the best thing about "CW" is that it wasn't the fourth album. i'm pretty sure that if they went through with it instead of putting a stop, talking some time and moving into writing "Danger Days...", there would've never been a "Danger Days...". and "Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys" is such a gem! it's a very good put together album. that's how clasic pop music is made, kids! fucks sake... so good.

i guess at the end of the day, even if they're "dead", i'm happy i got to know them and love them. i'm grateful that they're still there for me when i need them. and i'm grateful that i got to see them live at least once. because they were an act to see live. it only makes me sad that they had something very special going on and they gave up on it because it all was too much. i still respect them loads, and i'm secretely hoping they get back together. shush! let me dream.

in the meantime, i'm gonna keep blasting off all the wonderful songs they already blessed us with.

see ya later, killjoys ;)

it was a good run.

~talk's a waste of time~