Ok. So, this fanfic is not mine. It's a fic I found a few years ago (like five or four years ago) in Quizilla® -I mean, back when Quizilla was quizilla.com and not .teenick.com-. It was written by user AuroraMist, who took it down, and I don't know why.
She wrote a lot of amazing fan fictions; she's a hell of a writer. But this is definitely my favourite from her, and it is for sure the best My Chemical Romance fan fiction I've ever read. And I've read quite a few. So, I thought I'd share it -again- with the World. Cuz it's awesome, and it deserves to be read.
"Gerard, I can't take this anymore."
"Aw baby, just hold on a little longer."
"I don't think I can; this is driving me crazy."
"You deserve it."
"Gerard, I do not deserve this. And neither does Bert."
"Well, Frank doesn't either. If being with Bert is making you miserable you shouldn't be with him anymore. It's not only hurting you, it's hurting Frank and Bert too."
"How can it possibly be hurting Bert and Frank? Bert's so ignorant he's been flaunting us around and Frank can't be hurting because why on Earth would he care about me?"
"Frank is hurting because he doesn't want you to be with his friend while all he can do is sit around and watch but not get some one of his own. And Bert's called me, Carrie. Believe me, he's not as ignorant as he seems. He's seen the way you look at Frank and he's realized you like Frank as well as him. In fact, he's worried you like Frank more."
"Do you reckon I should let Frank know it's okay for him to see other people, too?"
"'Other people'? There are no other people! This whole situation is just a big dysfunctional mess. You should never have done that with Bert."
"Well, I did," I snapped, "okay?"
"I hope he's good in bed because otherwise it's not worth it. Okay, I have an idea."
"An idea? Ideas are great, especially ones from other people. Because my last idea was to ask them both if they minded sharing me."
"Carrie, check with me from now on before you put any ideas into action. Because that's a bad idea, mine's much better."
"Stop bragging and let's hear it."
"If you want to solve this, sit them down, tell them how you feel and let them know that you want everyone to come to a solution. Together."
I paused just to let Gerard think I was considering it. "Gerard," I whined eventually, "I can't do that! There are three of us and you think we're all going to come to ONE solution? No, what I need to do is wait this out."
"Wait this out? Are you nuts?!"
"Gee, my relationships never work; in fact, they barely ever last as long as this one with Bert has. Eventually this will all blow over and Frank and I can go back to being friends - instead to people who share the same apartment but don't talk. Yes, he can be my friend again. My friend who I think I'm in love with."
"That doesn't solve anything," Gerard hissed. "You don't want to dump Bert, you like Bert!"
"I have to make sacrifices."
"Carrie you like Bert!" He cried into his end of the line, hysterically.
"Yes, I do. But I'm so guilty I can barely touch Bert anymore. It feels as if I'm cheating on Frank."
I heard him mumbled something along the lines of 'You people are really messed up' before saying loudly, "Well then you have to dump Bert. It sounds like you're just using him for sexual chemistry. Have you two even been on a date?"
I tried to think. "Could you count spending two hours together, eating ice cream-"
"So far it's good."
"-in bed, after licking most of it off each other's bodies, as a date?"
"No, that's not a date. That's just the sexual chemistry again and guess what? That's not good!"
"Whoa. Sex isn't good?"
"Nuh-uh. You can't just base a relationship of sex - well not unless Bert is a skeazy, dirty old man and you're a whore."
"Damn. Some of my model friends get more money of them and I think they do something along the lines of that so maybe I could get them to throw some of their clients my way-"
"Carrie, you are not a whore and Bert is not ... old. I have another idea-"
"It had better be better than your last one, Gerard, or I'll hang up on you."
"Get Bert to go out somewhere with you and make sure he knows it's a date. Then ,if you like it, you can keep on dating until Bert does something stupid and you have an excuse to dump him. If you don't like the date, you can tell him you two don't have anything in common and break up with him gently, like that."
"Oh my God!" I exclaimed, trying to jump up and down, though it wasn't going well as I was in the bath.
"Is that a good 'Oh my God'?" Gerard asked wearily.
"Oh my god, that is such a good Oh my- Okay, you get the idea. But that might actually work."
"See? I'm good. Now, I've got to go and you have Bert to ask out on a date. So make it count Carrie-bear."
"Goodbye, Gee."
In hind-sight, I should have made it clear to Bert that a date couldn't include us sitting in darkness, very close together. But I didn't think of the potential dangers a movie date could pose beforehand and we spent our first date in Theatre 3 at the nearby cinema complex.
At first, things were going fine. We were sitting next to each other, in seats that didn't have arms or cup holders, so the space between our bodies was very minimal. Both Bert and I had our eyes glued to the huge screen, where King Kong was playing, and nothing suspicious was going on - in other words, Bert wasn't trying to seduce me yet... Until he decided that the movie was getting boring and screwing me would be a more interesting substitute.
It probably would have been too, if we weren't in public and we hadn't paid to actually watch the movie.
"Um, Bert?" I whispered, trying to push his hands away and move away from his mouth on my collarbone. "Bert, we're in a movie premiere - there are .. 200 people or so here."
"So you do want to do -"
"Bert, not here!" His hand slipped under my skirt and up my thigh and he smirked at me.
"Why? Are you - aw, Carrie-bear is afraid! Now, be honest, does intimate activity in public places intimidate you?"
Yes, I thought before saying defensively, "No!"
"That's all I needed to hear," he said, grinning, before attached his lips to mine. I played along until it got to the point where I was afraid I'd not be able to tell him to stop if it went any further.
So I stood up and told Bert quietly that I needed the toilet. I guess it was a good thing that I didn't really need to use the toilet because Bert followed me, locked the door and pressed me up against the wall, near the sinks. At first I refused to comply but when Bert McCracken is trying to bang you, it's pretty damn hard to tell him 'no'.
Well some might be able to but I can't.
And, in the taxi on the way back to the apartment, I couldn't say 'no' either.
Or on the elevator ... I'm kidding, we took the stairs (where, again, I couldn't say 'no'.)
"I hope you realize," I told Bert as we walked in, "that those three times mean that we're sleeping tonight."
Bert yawned and stretched his arms above his head. "That's okay, I'm kind of tired."
Frank walked past us and I think he was having a go at being nice because he didn't throw an insult, he just asked, "Tired, why are you tired?"
"Oh well see, I have a huge-" Bert started but I stepped down on his foot with my heeled boot and he shut up. I ignored how he looked at me with watery eyes and a whimper.
"The movie was really boring but I wouldn't let him drowse off and it was his nap time so now he's really tired so he'll..." I trailed off when I realized I wasn't really making much sense anymore.
Frank stood there, looking at the both of us for a long time. "I don't know why I even bother anymore," he muttered before walking off, into his room.
I bit my lip and followed him with my eyes. "You're going to go after him, aren't you?" Bert asked me.
I kissed his forehead. "Thank you Bertums. I'll be back."
"Be gentle with him," he called after me.
"I don't want to talk to you again, Bert," Frank growled when I entered. His back was facing me and he was sitting on his bed, fiddling with his guitar, Pansy.
"Bert, talked to you? God, I told him not to!"
"Spank him next time, maybe that'll get the message across."
"Why must you use sarcasm against me?" I demanded. "It's not very nice."
"It wasn't sarcasm; I'm actually trying to give tips to improve my best friend's sex life."
I smiled and sat next to him. "Best friend?"
"Stop hurting me and, yeah, I guess. Just bloody trust me when I tell you Bert's no good for you."
"Frank, I need to make my own decisions."
"Well, I have something to tell you and, if you'd heard what I had to say, then I'd let you make your own decision."
"I-" I tried to start.
"No, let me tell you and then you can make a new decision and I won't stand in your way. I lo-"
"This is your problem!" I told him, standing up. "I came in here to apologize and now you're trying to control my whole life! Get a girl to love and take control of your own life."
He gave me a hurt look before looking away and down at the mattress. "I think you should leave, Carrie."
What happened to 'Carrie-bear'? I thought. "No, I think we should get this out in the open. I think you should go out and find someone else so you can have a proper relationship instead of this weird one we have here. You need to find someone you can actually love."
"You just don't get it," Frank said quietly.
"Well maybe if you'd just tell me, already!"
"I shouldn't have to!" He yelled back, getting to his feet and facing me.
"It seems like you do have to!"
"We never used to."
"Things have changed you moron!"
He nodded in agreement but said coldly, "Get out."
"Are... are you serious?"
"Yeah, this time I am."
23
"Gerard, I can't take this anymore."
"Aw baby, just hold on a little longer."
"I don't think I can; this is driving me crazy."
"You deserve it."
"Gerard, I do not deserve this. And neither does Bert."
"Well, Frank doesn't either. If being with Bert is making you miserable you shouldn't be with him anymore. It's not only hurting you, it's hurting Frank and Bert too."
"How can it possibly be hurting Bert and Frank? Bert's so ignorant he's been flaunting us around and Frank can't be hurting because why on Earth would he care about me?"
"Frank is hurting because he doesn't want you to be with his friend while all he can do is sit around and watch but not get some one of his own. And Bert's called me, Carrie. Believe me, he's not as ignorant as he seems. He's seen the way you look at Frank and he's realized you like Frank as well as him. In fact, he's worried you like Frank more."
"Do you reckon I should let Frank know it's okay for him to see other people, too?"
"'Other people'? There are no other people! This whole situation is just a big dysfunctional mess. You should never have done that with Bert."
"Well, I did," I snapped, "okay?"
"I hope he's good in bed because otherwise it's not worth it. Okay, I have an idea."
"An idea? Ideas are great, especially ones from other people. Because my last idea was to ask them both if they minded sharing me."
"Carrie, check with me from now on before you put any ideas into action. Because that's a bad idea, mine's much better."
"Stop bragging and let's hear it."
"If you want to solve this, sit them down, tell them how you feel and let them know that you want everyone to come to a solution. Together."
I paused just to let Gerard think I was considering it. "Gerard," I whined eventually, "I can't do that! There are three of us and you think we're all going to come to ONE solution? No, what I need to do is wait this out."
"Wait this out? Are you nuts?!"
"Gee, my relationships never work; in fact, they barely ever last as long as this one with Bert has. Eventually this will all blow over and Frank and I can go back to being friends - instead to people who share the same apartment but don't talk. Yes, he can be my friend again. My friend who I think I'm in love with."
"That doesn't solve anything," Gerard hissed. "You don't want to dump Bert, you like Bert!"
"I have to make sacrifices."
"Carrie you like Bert!" He cried into his end of the line, hysterically.
"Yes, I do. But I'm so guilty I can barely touch Bert anymore. It feels as if I'm cheating on Frank."
I heard him mumbled something along the lines of 'You people are really messed up' before saying loudly, "Well then you have to dump Bert. It sounds like you're just using him for sexual chemistry. Have you two even been on a date?"
I tried to think. "Could you count spending two hours together, eating ice cream-"
"So far it's good."
"-in bed, after licking most of it off each other's bodies, as a date?"
"No, that's not a date. That's just the sexual chemistry again and guess what? That's not good!"
"Whoa. Sex isn't good?"
"Nuh-uh. You can't just base a relationship of sex - well not unless Bert is a skeazy, dirty old man and you're a whore."
"Damn. Some of my model friends get more money of them and I think they do something along the lines of that so maybe I could get them to throw some of their clients my way-"
"Carrie, you are not a whore and Bert is not ... old. I have another idea-"
"It had better be better than your last one, Gerard, or I'll hang up on you."
"Get Bert to go out somewhere with you and make sure he knows it's a date. Then ,if you like it, you can keep on dating until Bert does something stupid and you have an excuse to dump him. If you don't like the date, you can tell him you two don't have anything in common and break up with him gently, like that."
"Oh my God!" I exclaimed, trying to jump up and down, though it wasn't going well as I was in the bath.
"Is that a good 'Oh my God'?" Gerard asked wearily.
"Oh my god, that is such a good Oh my- Okay, you get the idea. But that might actually work."
"See? I'm good. Now, I've got to go and you have Bert to ask out on a date. So make it count Carrie-bear."
"Goodbye, Gee."
In hind-sight, I should have made it clear to Bert that a date couldn't include us sitting in darkness, very close together. But I didn't think of the potential dangers a movie date could pose beforehand and we spent our first date in Theatre 3 at the nearby cinema complex.
At first, things were going fine. We were sitting next to each other, in seats that didn't have arms or cup holders, so the space between our bodies was very minimal. Both Bert and I had our eyes glued to the huge screen, where King Kong was playing, and nothing suspicious was going on - in other words, Bert wasn't trying to seduce me yet... Until he decided that the movie was getting boring and screwing me would be a more interesting substitute.
It probably would have been too, if we weren't in public and we hadn't paid to actually watch the movie.
"Um, Bert?" I whispered, trying to push his hands away and move away from his mouth on my collarbone. "Bert, we're in a movie premiere - there are .. 200 people or so here."
"So you do want to do -"
"Bert, not here!" His hand slipped under my skirt and up my thigh and he smirked at me.
"Why? Are you - aw, Carrie-bear is afraid! Now, be honest, does intimate activity in public places intimidate you?"
Yes, I thought before saying defensively, "No!"
"That's all I needed to hear," he said, grinning, before attached his lips to mine. I played along until it got to the point where I was afraid I'd not be able to tell him to stop if it went any further.
So I stood up and told Bert quietly that I needed the toilet. I guess it was a good thing that I didn't really need to use the toilet because Bert followed me, locked the door and pressed me up against the wall, near the sinks. At first I refused to comply but when Bert McCracken is trying to bang you, it's pretty damn hard to tell him 'no'.
Well some might be able to but I can't.
And, in the taxi on the way back to the apartment, I couldn't say 'no' either.
Or on the elevator ... I'm kidding, we took the stairs (where, again, I couldn't say 'no'.)
"I hope you realize," I told Bert as we walked in, "that those three times mean that we're sleeping tonight."
Bert yawned and stretched his arms above his head. "That's okay, I'm kind of tired."
Frank walked past us and I think he was having a go at being nice because he didn't throw an insult, he just asked, "Tired, why are you tired?"
"Oh well see, I have a huge-" Bert started but I stepped down on his foot with my heeled boot and he shut up. I ignored how he looked at me with watery eyes and a whimper.
"The movie was really boring but I wouldn't let him drowse off and it was his nap time so now he's really tired so he'll..." I trailed off when I realized I wasn't really making much sense anymore.
Frank stood there, looking at the both of us for a long time. "I don't know why I even bother anymore," he muttered before walking off, into his room.
I bit my lip and followed him with my eyes. "You're going to go after him, aren't you?" Bert asked me.
I kissed his forehead. "Thank you Bertums. I'll be back."
"Be gentle with him," he called after me.
"I don't want to talk to you again, Bert," Frank growled when I entered. His back was facing me and he was sitting on his bed, fiddling with his guitar, Pansy.
"Bert, talked to you? God, I told him not to!"
"Spank him next time, maybe that'll get the message across."
"Why must you use sarcasm against me?" I demanded. "It's not very nice."
"It wasn't sarcasm; I'm actually trying to give tips to improve my best friend's sex life."
I smiled and sat next to him. "Best friend?"
"Stop hurting me and, yeah, I guess. Just bloody trust me when I tell you Bert's no good for you."
"Frank, I need to make my own decisions."
"Well, I have something to tell you and, if you'd heard what I had to say, then I'd let you make your own decision."
"I-" I tried to start.
"No, let me tell you and then you can make a new decision and I won't stand in your way. I lo-"
"This is your problem!" I told him, standing up. "I came in here to apologize and now you're trying to control my whole life! Get a girl to love and take control of your own life."
He gave me a hurt look before looking away and down at the mattress. "I think you should leave, Carrie."
What happened to 'Carrie-bear'? I thought. "No, I think we should get this out in the open. I think you should go out and find someone else so you can have a proper relationship instead of this weird one we have here. You need to find someone you can actually love."
"You just don't get it," Frank said quietly.
"Well maybe if you'd just tell me, already!"
"I shouldn't have to!" He yelled back, getting to his feet and facing me.
"It seems like you do have to!"
"We never used to."
"Things have changed you moron!"
He nodded in agreement but said coldly, "Get out."
"Are... are you serious?"
"Yeah, this time I am."
xo-
~ My Chemical Romance is done. But it can never die. Because it is not a band- it is an idea. ~
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